I was cleaning up my stuff around the house trying to get it all organized and came upon a letter that I had received while in the MTC. I had forgotten about it but not the message inside. It was from Amy and had the typical update stuff what's going in your life type of stuff which I love to hear about but also included was one of her recent blog posts. I opened the letter again and began to read the blog post. Amy lost her husband a couple years ago while he was serving in the military and the blog post was about an afternoon she had had battling her feelings and going to his grave and the feelings that accompanied the day and then going to a place for lunch and a song came on that had been the last song that had really meant something to the both of them and the love that she felt from her husband because he had sent the song to her and the love she felt from him. Because of the plan of Salvation and that she knew where her husband was and that she'd see him again one day. I won't try to repeat the whole story because I couldn't do it justice. She writes much more beautifully then I do. Go find it and read it. But I share this because as I finished the letter my eyes watered up a bit and I was filled with an appreciation for the Plan of Salvation that I am privileged to know and to share for the next 2 years. As I sat and reflected I didn't really know why I came on a mission honestly. I almost didn't come on one but I prayed and got an answer it was the right thing to do. I could write a whole other post about that parents you can ask about that later but as I sat there and thought about what i had just read and the plan of salvation I realized why I'm here. It's to share this beautiful message of the The Plan of HAPPINESS of salvation the perfect plan that guides our lives and gives us direction here. The plan that can comfort a young widow or strengthen a young boy 8000 miles away from home. I'm here because people everywhere need this beautiful message of this gospel and that plan that accompanies it. I found my WHY? I've come to realize while I've been here that before i came the gospel meant very little to me. I went to Church, to seminary, read my scriptures on and off. Did the stuff I was supposed to but didn't really realize the importance that it should have in my life. I almost didn't come out here but I will be forever blessed because of this opportunity i'm having right now. This plan that we know of is a blessing beyond measure. That we can all come here experience our hardships and one day return to God. Our loving father. This is all possible because of a brother that lived, suffered, died, and rose again. For each of us individually. Because of him all we must do is come unto him and become a little better everyday. Try a little harder. Learn a little more and he will comfort us, strengthen us, guide us, and so much more. I sat and reflected all of this as I set the paper down and realized the true purpose of why i'm here on a mission. To bring about the salvation of souls. My purpose as a missionary became so real and got so much meaning in that moment as I realized this plan that made the story i had just read possible was why i was here and everyone needed it. What is your WHY? for being in this gospel. Find that why and hold onto it. Strengthen it everyday. Become, learn, and grow in this gospel. If your 8 or 80 you can find something to improve on. This gospel is the most important thing in your life and you should treat is as such. I don't write this pretending to be perfect or that I have ever done this in the past. I didn't put it on the level it should of been but I know I should now and I think everyone of knows that we should but life gets in the way. Search for that WHY? Hold on to it and try be a little better everyday because of it. People. I know Christ lives and knows each one of you. You have a loving heavenly father who knows you and what's best for you. His commandments will give you blessing beyond what your mind can imagine and you will find joy like you have never had if you hold onto this gospel and follow it's teachings. Find your WHY? and happiness will find you. Don't make what i'm doing out here be in vain.
"The gospel should not be a checklist or something you do out of a feeling of responsibility to others but should be lived because you have a personal why and you know your purpose here in life" Yet again this made no sense and was a ramble but I hope you got the message i was trying to convey.
That was long and different but I've wanted to share that experience since it happened and just got around to it. Didn't really make much sense or come out how i wanted it but oh well.
This week was a normal week not much happened. We've running around getting it trying to spread this he is the gift message. We made a goal for 4 baptisms when I first got here and we have a mission goal to get 300 baptisms before the end of the year. We need 86 as a whole mission and 4 here... That doesn't sound like a lot but here in Shkoder that is a lot especially when you think that we only have 3 weeks to do it now. We have two twins that the other elders are teaching that are super solid and progressing but we need two other people that we can commit. We have some hopefuls but it seems like everyone of our potentials would be hard to get by the end of the year and we can't meet with them very often and we haven't gotten any baptismal dates yet. I have no idea how its going to happen but we are trying to have faith and do everything we can to achieve this goal. I honestly have no idea how we're going to do it but Nefi didn't know how he would get the plates, Moses didn't know how he would get the people out of Egypt and so on. The Lord works in mysterious ways and We are trusting in him and not ourselves. Because the he is the gift thing isn't in Albanian our mission has kind of had to improvise so we got Albanian subtitles for the video and got Albanian pass along cards for it and these big posters posted to contact with. and We got it on this big screen that's in the middle of Tirana. It's a shortened version of the video that is about 30 seconds long that plays every three minutes!! Isn't that awesome???!! it's basically the times square equivalent of Albania! It's cool to see what we've been able to do with it even though it would have been a lot better in English because we could just say hey go watch this video you speak English! We have to get people to come to the church or carry around our little dvd players for lessons. It's been a little difficult but at least we have all this stuff. It's better than nothing! Always a positive perspective. We had a couple lessons this week that we got to share the video in but 2 of them weren't super effective because the first one was with a lady named Liza who we started meeting with again. She's met with a bunch of missionaries and changes her number then meets with another set but we actually went to her house and had a good first lesson with her but this one there was a ton of kids in the house going in and out and her husband wants money from the church so he was talking about not having work and how America is a fairy tale where everyone has work and lives on rainbows and at the end of the lesson her dad and brother came in and totally prished the lesson. So we just ended and left. We shared the video and got a little good discussion but it wasn't the right environment and didn't have the impact it could have. But the good is that she's actually reading the book of mormon and came to church two weeks ago. But the husband might be a challenge we'll see.
The other one was with the family that has an active member that moved. It is really hard to get all of the families attention at once and people are in and out and the five year old doesn't sit still. We showed the video but it didn't go very well. Just not the right environment again. But the grandma who is super catholic has been reading the chapters we've been leaving them. I didn't really know what do about that family because they know about the church and we just need to get them excited. We will keep working with them hopefully something happens.
The last one was we went to the other Elders less active who is an old lady. Not the crazy one other one but she wasn't home so we knocked on her families door who are our less actives who we called and they came to church two weeks ago and they never answer the door but she did and said to come in so we have an improv lesson and showed the video and they really liked it. It was her and her daughter but she is one of the leeches and was talking about how they didn't give her enough help and she knows better than everyone and all this stuff but we hope we can get her excited about the gospel again and the dad isn't a member so it things progress we can get him involved too. That's it for this week. Not much happening here. I love you all. Keep me in your prayers. Elder Szabo
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